"she's gonna marry that boy someday..."

No, the title is not in reference to me, haha. Yesterday, my friend got married. I am so excited for the two of them; they make a great couple. But it's a little surreal...I remember when she was a senior, leading all of us brand-new freshmen, and the pride that she had in her "single independent woman" status. And now, she's married. Crazy what happens in four years' time.

It was a breath of fresh air to see so many familiar faces. I didn't realize how much I missed them, especially "the girls" (can't really classify us as seniors now, haha). Friendships are an interesting thing. Within that group, my core college group, it's a mix of many different personalities, backgrounds, and interests. But somehow, we all bonded together. We went through a lot of stuff together. People were hurt at times (and I know I did some of the hurting), but there was room for forgiveness and acceptance for change...in personalities, in emotions, in relationships. We all have varying degrees of closeness to each other, but that's to be expected in any group. It seems like within our group, there was a commitment to each other, that overrode any differences or disagreements or disappointments. I finally figured out how to break down my walls and let them in.

And it's been tough for us all to be separate, I think (or at least in my situation). Not a 5-10 minute walk away (or a shout across the room, in some cases)...more like a 4 hour (or 7 hour, or 2 day) drive. "Regular" conversations are no longer daily, but maybe weekly, or bi-weekly, or just random Facebook messages. We're all at new stages in our lives...marriages, jobs, grad schools...and all figuring out what is next and where in the world we're headed. But even though we've had changes and are away from each other...I still feel that connection to them. I feel a security in those relationships, that I don't have to talk to them every single day in order to remain close to them. (Not that I wouldn't mind talking to them every day, but the reality of our situations doesn't allow for that!) And that's a good feeling, to know that if I'm really struggling, I can still pick up a phone and call one of them and be honest with them. Yeah, our relationships are going to shift as we settle into these new lives. But I think if we are willing to move with the changes and accept them for what they are, it won't be devastating. Nor will it mean the relationships are any less important. They'll just be...different.

It takes time to build those relationships. I know. It will take time here to build similar ones. So I'm back at square one, trying to put aside my unrealistic expectations and slowly break down the walls that I've already built up around me...